Where art thou my Queen tine(😂😂)
Hey guys how are you doing? I hope everyone is doing fine. I genuinely hope you guys are doing good or at least trying your best to stay sane because phew! It’s not easy.
I don’t even know what day it is any more because I’ve gotten so exhausted from keeping track of the days.
A little challenge: Check up on someone today be it your family, friend, neighbor, just check up on someone and see how they’re doing. You never can tell whose day you’ll make or light you’ll shine.
*A moment of silence for those whose lives have been lost due to this pandemic, sickness, rape and police brutality*
This quarantine has made me realize a lot of things and has forced a lot of us to self reflect.
I honestly never knew how much growth I needed in my life until this period (I’m sure it’s the same for you).
Some of us are going to discover how lonely we truly feel this period because we’re being compelled to stay at home without visiting anyone or going anywhere. Being alone is different from feeling lonely because we can be alone in a place and still feel very happy but loneliness is an in-depth issue and is one of the worst feelings ever because it can drive your mind into places you never even thought of. Loneliness can make you feel depressed, make you have suicidal thoughts, make you feel unloved, make you wish to go back to a relationship that you were sure you were done with, etc because that’s just what it does(it’s way deeper than we think). That moment when you just feel so void in your heart and nothing seems to make you happy. It is quite appalling to find out that there are actually people that don’t feel lonely like please can you actually teach us?!! The thing about loneliness is that no one can fill that void except God. Being in a relationship, friendships, working, eating, and many more can’t even fill it(the void) instead they make you feel fulfilled just at that moment and once these things are taken away from you the feeling comes back. I feel like loneliness is something that is built over time i.e it’s like a seed that keeps growing but this time a bad seed so you have to uproot it. Let’s be real, lack of love(it can be lack of self love too)is actually one of the main causes of this feeling. Deep down you just feel neglected, distant, shut out, and invisible by everyone including yourself.
Most African parents aren’t even close to their children and even if they don’t know it, this has a huge psychological effect on their children and their children grow up feeling neglected. I’m going to try my best to break this down as much as I really can. Most parents just believe that their role is just to provide materialistic things for their children forgetting that the most important thing in every child is their mental health. Most people that have to deal with loneliness often have love issues ie, no one really showed them utmost love when they were little so they grew with that emptiness in their heart or they just felt left out so they did everything possible to get people’s attention. Normally, the backup plan is always to throw a pity party but how about we just deal with the issue now so we can stop clinging on to other people & things and stop depending on their love for survival. Being in a relationship isn’t going to fix you, being a workaholic isn’t going to fix you, and drinking isn’t going to fix you either.
Firstly, you have to pray about it because you need God’s help and He’s literally the only one that can fix you. While you’re waiting on God don’t just sit around all moody, sad, grumpy and just having self-pity, actually try helping yourself. Try finding a place in your heart where there’s love for yourself and work from there. Search yourself for the light in you and let it shine. Gass yourself up, do stuff like singing, drawing, learning new stuff, anything you genuinely love, and just make yourself so comfortable around you so that even when everyone leaves you, know your happiness isn’t going to walk right behind them. Pull yourself together, it’s going to be hard and it might take a while but eventually, you’ll get there. When sadness and loneliness try to creep in just search for that light and choose happiness. Honestly, happiness is one thing only you can decide to have and I hope you choose it. When you focus on you and loving you, you’ll have enough to give out to others because you can only give what you have and there’s nothing more healthy than a cheerful heart.
Don’t worry about the people that left you or hurt you or the parent that wasn’t there for you, forgive everyone including yourself, and move on. Just let it go and whenever you see yourself going back to that place of pity and sadness just search for the light and joy within you and stir them back up and I promise with time you’ll see the best things falling in place in your life.
Nothing is easy but somethings are just worth the work. I pray God heals everyone that’s hurting, everyone that has a void in their heart, people with daddy and mummy issues, people that feel ostracized, and basically everyone that needs help. I pray we find the light in our hearts and I pray we don’t give anyone the power to make us feel lonely or unhappy in Jesus name. Amen
Stay tuned! Love you!!❤️